An arbitrator has ruled that former Detroit Lion wide receiver Charles Rogers owes his former team 8.5 million dollars because of his violation of the NFL’s substance abuse policy. Originally, the Lions sought 10.184 million dollars of Rogers’ 14 million dollar signing bonus, but the arbitrator set the final amount they are allowed to collect. This is of course if you actually believe that Charles Rogers actually has any of that money left. The former #2 pick has been out of the league since the Lions cut him in 2006. Here is Chuck’s response when he thought he owed the original 10.184 according to the Detroit Free Press:
…after the Lions originally filed their grievance in 2005, seeking more than $10 million, Rogers said: “It’s going to be kind of hard to get 10.†He laughed and added: “We’ll see, man.â€
Ummm, this isn’t exactly like stiffing your buddy 20 bucks Charles, this is a semi-professional football team were talking about here. But if you want to know why Mr. Rogers is so calm about owing such a large amount of money, it’s because we hooked him up with The Angry T payment plan. Below is exactly how Rogers is planning on selling off his possessions to pay back 8.5 million dollars.
1. Selling off 10,000 shares of Pepsico= $595,200
Once Rogers found out that Pepsico owned Funyuns and Cheetos he bought up 10,000 shares. Unfortunately as the stock dropped 30 bucks a share he was too busy eating Funyuns and Cheetos to notice.
2. Selling his Collarbone to science = $250,000
Doctors are intrigued by Rogers’ collarbone which as the Lions found out, snaps when you look at it funny.
3. Selling Autographed Bobby Williams pictures = $15
This one didn’t go according to plan.
4. Lemonade Sales = $20
Lemonade with crack Sales= $154,765
Charles Rogers is in a tough situation right now, but as his mother use to say, when life throws you a lemon, sprinkle crack on it and make lemonade.
5. Selling trunk full of dead hookers stuffed with a variety of drugs = $7,500,000
This chick was pretty hot before stuffing 20 lbs of weed up her butt.
-Violent J
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