Dec
15
2008

Jim Zorn Feels like ‘Worst Coach in America.’ We Give him 10 reason to Feel Better

Written by admin | Visited 655 times, 11 so far today

Despite how you may feel Mr. Zorn, at 7-7, you are not the worst coach in America.   In fact, with two more wins, you my equal the success of your Hall of Fame predescor Joe Gibbs in 2007.  It’s not like you inherited the 85′ Bears pal, cheer up.

Most importantly, you aren’t nearly as bad as the guys below.  Jim, here are 10 reasons for you to feel better about yourself.

We present out list of the 10 Worst Coaches of All-Time

10. Marty Morningwheg – Detroit Lions  – 5-27. I don’t care if he was coaching a wheelchair basketball team in an NFL game, this guy was terrible.  Although, I caddied for him at Meadowbrook Country Club in Northville, MI and he gave me a $100 tip and was an incredibly nice guy, so he gets a pass from me.

9. Marion Campbell - Atlanta Falcons & Philadelphia Eagles - Marion Campbell was 46 games under .500 in his NFL coaching career, good for the most games under .500 for any coach in NFL history.  That little record not only speaks to his futility, but also his ability to convince an owner that he was capable of coaching a football team, despite never putting together a winning record in nine seasons.

http://i.cdn.turner.com/sivault/image/1980/11/23/001315813.jpg
8. Bill Hanzlik – Denver Nuggets - 11-71 – .136 Winning Percentage - At least NBA brass had the foresight to never hire this guy again after the 98′ season.  His 11-71 record is the worst record ever for an NBA coach for a full-season:
http://www.goldcrownfoundation.com/images/Hanzaction.jpg
7. Sidney Lowe - Minnesota Timberwolves and Memphis Grizzlies - In all fairness to Sidney, it’s not as if he was ever given an actual NBA roster to coach.  In all fairness to his win / loss record, he was awful and after we was fired, Hubie Brown took the team to the NBA playoffs the next season.
6. Bert Bell – Philadelphia Eagles - Statistically, Bert is the worst coach in NFL history.  However, he coached during war time and he was only paid 1.5 ham sandwiches per week, so I rally can’t blame him for his futility.
 
5. Ted Turner – Atlanta Braves - Ted came out of the owners both for one game to post the worst winning percentage in MLB history at .000 (0-1)
http://i.a.cnn.net/si/2007/writers/john_donovan/07/31/glavine.300/t1_tom_glavine.jpg
4. Brian Winters – Vancouver Grizzlies, Golden State Warriors - Bill was another victim of circumstance having coached terrible teams in Vancouver and Golden State.  Bill also holds the impressive distinction of having the lowest winning percentage in NBA history (.196) of any coach who has coached over 100 games.
(Back in his glory days)
http://www.nba.com/media/Winters,B.jpg
3. Rod Marinelli – Detroit Lions - You can’t have a worst coaches list without including a couple Lions’ head coaches.  Rod WILL become the first coach to go winless for a 16 game season and this ineptitude deserves recognition.
(He had no clue what was coming)
http://i.a.cnn.net/si/2006/writers/michael_silver/01/20/friday/t1_marinelli.millen.jpg
Rick Kotite – Philadelphia Eagles (where he was good), New York Jets (where he was awful) – Kotite was Morninwegish as Jets coach and finished with the worst record in the league two years in a row.  Even the Lions have not accomplished such a feat, in spite of employing Matt Millen as GM.
http://weblogs.newsday.com/sports/basketball/nba/blog/kotite.jpg
1.  Jimmy Patsos – Loyola (Md) Basketball Coach – I had such a hard time figuring out who the worst coach of all-time actually was, I decided to give this idiot the title.  Coach Patsos decided to double team Stephen Curry no matter where he went on the court and play 3 vs. 4. Check out the video:

Now here’s the box score.  0 points for Curry and a 30 point loss for the Loyola Greyhounds.  Great work coach. 

Let me know who I missed in the comments.

The Angry T

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