The PR machine for the National Football League is working overtime as we speak. Terrel Owens is taking pills, Chargers safety Terrance Kiel is arrested for selling pills, yet we all keep drinking the NFL kool-aid. Writers and analysts bash baseball as law-less and a steroid haven yet no stones are thrown at the literally dozens of felons and pill poppers and HGH users in the NFL. Who the hell is Roger Goodell sleeping with to keep the NFL’s media image squeaky clean? My current fantasy involves the NFL commish and Linda Cohn, and I am the interloping TV repairman who gets in on the action. But seriously Pablo Escobar Kiel is indicted on federal drug charges for what looks like pill trafficking and we all turn a blind eye and make a joke about Barry Bonds. Why is baseball the whipping boy? Do not tell me it’s about steroids because everybody and their sister knows the NFL has huge human growth hormone problems. Yet the NFL refuses to test for HGH (just like baseball) but the NFL does not receive any of the negative media attention that baseball does. Well, you druggies don’t fool me, I have connected the dots. Terrell Owens overdoses on pain pills, which he probably picked up from Terrence Kiel-Escobar. Kiel employs Chris Henry as a foot-soldier to peddle the pills. Occasionally drug trade gets violent and at this point Keith Davis, on his way to church, inevitably ends up in the cross-fire. If you are unclear on any of this, please read the preceding columns. I think that all NFL players should have to complete the D.A.R.E. program and I won’t watch another game until this requirement is met…until this Sunday. By the way, you can now play a “Where’s Waldo?” type game by playing “Where’s Chris Henry?” when looking at Cincinnati police reports.
Here’s your first opportunity, enjoy.
The Angry T
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where’s waldo gameThe NFL’s Smokescree