Indian Rugby Team ordered to eat 15 eggs a day…Bartolo Colon Looking into how to play Rugby, Indian Heritage

When Norman Laker left South Africa to take the head coaching job for the 83^rd ranked Indian Rugby National Team his job was to quickly whip the team into shape for the Commonwealth Games which India is hosting in October 2010.

But when Laker saw his scrawny team he knew a drastic change was needed. The Indian Rugby team averaged about 170 lbs …..a far cry from the 195-220 lb men they’ll be seeing in October. So Coach Laker has ordered his team to eat fifteen eggs everyday in order to put on the weight. While this is a decent way to put on weight, the Stallone diet isn’t the only way to pack on the pounds. Here are few more diets out there if India wants to compete with the All-Blacks and Wallabies.

The Bill Romanowski Diet:

1.Take glass of water and put 20 scoops of Romo’s Nutrition 53 products (Lean1, Neuro1, Multi1) until the bubbles resemble the poison sign….quickly drink entire glass.

2. Repeat step 1 untill you begin to feel internal bleeding.

3. Take glass of water and put 20 scoops of Romo’s Sleep1 mix…quickly drink entire glass.

4. Pray to God you wake up tomorrow.

The Andre the Giant Diet

1. Go to restaurant, order every item on the menu

2.Order 117 Beers or 3 fifths of vodka (your choice)

3.Wrestle Big John Studd

The Oliver Miller Diet

1.Golden Corral Breakfast Buffet

2.Repeat for Lunch and Dinner

3.Weep for your young children who will grow up without a father

The Tank Johnson Diet

1. Get arrested for possession of a gattlin gun and the assault chopper from Predator

2. Swallow sadness in prison by eating all this shit:

• Beef Sticks-162
• Honey Buns-40
• Summer Sausage-35
• Potato Chips-35
• Cups of coffee-22
• Fruit Punch-10
• Tuna fish sandwiches-10
• Jalapeno Cheese spread-9
• Tortillas-9
• Refried Beans-6
• Cookies-6

(Hey, that cookie total isn’t terrible, I have to imagine depression about being in prison would have led me to eat hundreds of cookies in 120 days)

3. Become an over performer in an HBO series and an under performer on the field the next season.

4. Get cut from your professional football team

The Sonya Thomas Diet

1. Become a competitive eater as 120 pound Asain woman

2. Consumer this amount of food:

• Asparagus
  • 5.75 pounds of tempura deep fried asparagus spears in 10 minutes
• Cheesecakes
  • 11 pounds of downtown Atlantic cheesecake in 9 minutes
• Chicken nuggets
  • 80 chicken nuggets in 5 minutes
• Chicken wings
  • 173 chicken wings in 12 minutes
• Crabcakes
  • 46 three ounce crabcakes in 10 minutes
• Eggs
  • 65 hard boiled eggs in 6 minutes and 40 seconds
• Fruitcakes
  • 4 pounds, 14 1/4 ounces of Wegman’s Fruitcake in 10 minutes
• Hamburgers
  • 7 burgers (3/4 pound) “Thickburgers” in 10 minutes
• Jambalaya
  • 9 pounds of crawfish jambalaya in 10 minutes
• Lobster
  • 44 lobsters totaling 11.3 pounds of lobster meat in 12 minutes
• Oysters
  • 46 dozen Acme Oysters in 10 minutes(2005)
  • 29 dozen ACME Oysters in 8 minutes (2009)-Louisiana oyster season produced much larger oysters in 2009 explaining the slower pace -reclaimed the Wolrd Oyster Eating title
• Pizza
  • 6 extra large Bacci pizza slices in 15 minutes
• Pulled pork
  • 23 pulled pork sandwiches in 10 minutes
• Tacos
  • 43 soft tacos in 11 minutes
• Tater tots
  • 250 tater tots in 5 minutes
• Turducken
  • 7 3/4 pounds Turducken.com Thanksgiving Dinner in 12 minutes

3. Never gain any weight

If those diets don’t help you Indian Rugby player, you might just be screwed.

Violent J

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