I was flipping through the New York Times Magazine on Monday (give me a break, it had Natalie Portman on the cover) and I came across this real estate listing.

Sounds nice, right? But the listing agent committed the cardinal sin of real estate agents (AngryT’s dad, a Trump-level mega-mogul in his own right will confirm this for you), and didn’t mention the biggest perk…the house is in Tiger Woods’ Isleworth neighborhood. How much more appealing would this house sound if instead of just saying “gorgeous views of hole #6,” it said “gorgeous views of Tiger Woods winning $20K from Mark O’Meara by holing an 8 iron from 174 yds,” or “gorgeous views through the back window of Tiger Woods’ wife as she showers.”

I did some more snooping, and a mere $1.55 million will get you in the front gates of Tiger’s ‘hood (that’s $7600 a month with a down payment for the mortgage plus $1800 for taxes). The most expensive listed place is $7.475 million, with taxes north of $6000 a month. No word on how much Tiger ponied up at closing on his $38 million spread. I’m sure they’d run a check of your bank account before even divulging that lots like that exist, but sharing a neighborhood with Eldrick, Shaq, Vinsanity, and Ken Griffey Jr. probably helps resale value right?

Better than having this place next to you at least.

Tenacious E

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